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Had I but thought to bookmark the page? You can take this as a dream if the presentation seems implausible.

I read the words of a woman who like many had been introduced to female dominance by her husband. He also brought in the theme of male orgasm denial.

Once begun she’d come to slowly increment the length of his periods of denial. The last time for slightly less than two months.

Most recently it seemed because of her own need that they had traditional penetrative sex. Both had fun.

But something had been nagging her in the back of her mind.

- The problem with my retelling is that the woman was probably the least lucid dominant female I can recall ever reading. -

After what sounded like much inner grappling she’d come to discover that even though she enjoyed the sex the experience left her dissatisfied. That either releasing him from chastity or having him inside of her left her confused, perhaps depressed or even angry with herself.

It seemed that they’d had a happy marriage before he became her slave. No mention of their marriage actually improving after the change: that he’d been in any way neglectful before. Still she seemed to feel that conventional sex made him a less satisfactory slave. But she didn’t cite any actual failings on his part.

Reading between the lines is a risky textual game but necessary with someone whose sentences were as murky has hers.

Perhaps her feelings stemmed a sense that she’d lost power. Not so much in anything he did but by relaxing her own ruthlessness. Or that being kind inherently compromised her sense of role.

More significantly the woman seemed actually annoyed that F/m couples might have a successful power exchange without a chastity regimen.

In the background I perceived what appeared to be a feeling that she’d let her side (for want of a better term) and hadn’t been “a true Femdom.” That side perhaps being dominant women in general or well I can’t even guess.

The possibility that she was striving to live up to some hypothetical image of the ideal Domme - the product of others - was troubling.

More so was the image of a woman who had enslaved her husband but was floundering in confusion.

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unfortunately, I think this is probably fairly common, especially among Dom/mes who start as a way to appease a partner. there is a lot of confusing information out there, and to be told repeatedly that a “true” Dom/me says/does things a certain way can really mess with the psyche.

the most valuable thing I’ve learned over the years is that what works for me in whatever relationship I am in is my own personal “true” path. I happen to adore chastity, and also love using my boy for intercourse. the tease of when exactly I’m going to take off the chastity and indulge myself with his charms is a huge turn on for both of us.

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